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Wednesday, August 12, 2015

The Oppression of a One Piece



I know.  It sounds a bit dramatic.  You're probably asking, how is one oppressed by a one piece bathing suit?  Well, I'll tell you.  The oppression is real, people!  The last thing I want to do is squeeze my 6 foot tall body into anything.  Especially something that is traditionally unflattering, like a one piece bathing suit.  I think the last time I was in one, I was 14 years old (aka. before boobies and booty).

My son is now six years old and is in school full time.  Not only is he in school, but he goes to a Catholic Private School that has a fairly conservative clientele.  I really thought I could fake it.  Wearing my most modest outfits to pick him up on the playground and at school functions.  Well, this year my son went to a ridiculous amount of classmate birthday parties and three of them happened to be swimming parties. 

The first one, I didn't even bring a bathing suit.  I stood on the side of the pool and helplessly yelled at my son for going past the shallow end.  The second one, I packed my most conservative bikini (because I only owned two pieces), but couldn't bare to wear it out front of all the dads.  I can just see it now... "can you believe what Mikey's mom was wearing in the pool out from of our husbands?"  I don't need any of that.  So, I again helplessly tried to wrangle my son from the deep end to the shallow end.  The third pool party, I looked in awe at one mom brave enough to get in and keep the kids where they should be. 

I realized at that moment that the only thing holding me back from getting into the water and being the awesome mom was my bathing suit selection.  Here's where the oppression begins.  I try on at least ten different one pieces.  Ranging from a sporty Speedo to a tankini.  Hated it.  Hated how it felt.  Hated how it looked.  Then, just as I was about to give up, an order from Beautiful Halo came in and this incredibly fun and sporty one piece looked like it might actually fit.  I put it on and, crap... it fit.

I write this blog to hold myself accountable.  Next pool party, I'm in the water.  No more standing on the sidelines yelling at my kid.  I'm getting in and going to help wrangle those kids with the other brave moms.  Know this though, the oppression of a one piece, I'm feeling it.

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